Monday, May 17, 2010

What EXACTLY Makes A Marriage Work?

First off I want to thank my readers for all your support, it has really been inspiring for me. Its been a whirl-wind last 2 weeks and I fully plan on planting myself this weekend and blooming at HOME!

I still have to load up some videos on the fitness studio interview, I have to blog about the hotel and get the thank you letters out, get my disk to the Walgreens and get copies for my mom, (please pray for her to get well) and food shop for my new meal I am feeling a bit over-whelmed!

Our weather has been so cloudy its just un-motavating, and I have got to be more productive at night then I have been. Really lacking on my spreadsheet entries and getting the books in order for the 2nd quarter, bad T. BAD! It's not like I am being a slacker really, I am doing work just not fast enough or could it be that as I get a year older each year I am MISSING a step?

Where does the time go? Too fast as the bible states that its just a vapor is sooooo true!
Tonight I am teaching step class and as a matter of fact last Mondays step class was the last workout I did.

Zip, notta, zilch, not even yoga......uggg.

Seriously I almost fell asleep 2 times coming home from my moms driving, so NOT good! Lets hope this months Oxygen Magazine gets me pumped up (did you see the new egg white pizza recipe???) and my new InSanity dvd thats on its way will give me the swift kick in the bum I need! Yano?

I found this great website and have enjoyed a few articles. I really found this one interesting on relationships/marriage as a person that is almost 48 and never married, I am constantly learning and trying to better myself for when that day finally happens. (or should just write on a book on how NOT to have a bad relationship)

Do you have some tips?

I have let some things go, really I have not that I lowered the bar just some things that being by yourself for so long become your normal way when what is normal anyways?
It is not the end of the earth if the hand towel is not straight is it? (it makes the room look messy)
What about the bed being made? (starts the day off without wanting to get back IN it)
I suppose being a "visual" person has its ups and down, but I do like things orderly... is that SO bad?

Q: Do you gain any insight into whether a happy marriage is a question of finding the right match, or are there individuals who are just more functional in relationships?

A: There are things that predict a more stable partner. Having divorce in your family, marrying at a young age, marrying someone of a completely different religion or who has completely different ideas about money make a relationship more likely to fail. A volatile courtship is going to predict a volatile marriage. If you're not madly in love during courtship, it's not going to happen in marriage. If you don't have a great sex life, it's not going to get better with marriage. If you're unsure about your partner, there's nothing to suggest that you become more sure after you get married. It's pretty logical stuff. People make the mistake of assuming that things get better after marriage, but partners don't fundamentally change. When you talk to both people who are divorced and people who are long married, you hear the same thing: "I knew." You have to listen to your instincts.

Q: A lot of people talk about marriage being hard work. Is that true even for very happy couples?

A: It's an interesting notion, because marriage is getting stronger and there are fewer divorces. It seems clear that we have higher expectations for marriage than we did 50 years ago, and the stakes are higher. Marriage feels like a lot of work, but I ask people if they also feel like their friendships and children are work. Even friendships need to be maintained and tended to. Marriages need the same care other relationships need, and you can't take them for granted. They're labours of love.

Here is the link with the rest of the Q&A and just for some great reading I just love sharing great sites don't you?

The site is Thats Fit and I have it book marked. I plan on burning some BUCKLOADS of calories and stress hormones tonight ..... watch out class T. is bringing the BIG guns.


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